Christmas time is here :o)

So Thanksgiving has passed, and Christmas time is here!!! Cannot wait to start the holiday festivities!!! And eat candy canes :o) God, please let me enjoy this holiday with no problems!!!

I'm done most of my Christmas shopping... that is sure a good feeling! I started earlier this year, and it seems to be working out so much better!

So we have decided we are going down to Mississippi to visit over the holidays! Wow, its been awhile. Last time I was there was April/May of 2006. I am nervous about it as I always am and pray that it goes smoothly. I felt alittle better after having a funny text convo with Pete's Dad Thanksgiving night though! He was being so funny... I felt so bad that he spent Thanksgiving alone :o( hopefully next year that won't be the case! I'd like to be down there for Thanksgiving.

Mini-Updates of the fam...

Pete: Doing well! Hating his job, but thats not news ha ha. He's doing well in school! He's a tad stressed so the Christmas break is coming at an awesome time.

Me: SO a huge step happened for me... I figured out what I really want to do, but I'm not talking about it. Liz mentioned this statistic that people who talk about their ideas are less likely to do them due to the sense of accomplishment at just the thought of the idea. So NO talking about I decided. Just do it. I'm getting jewelry orders for Christmas! And I also got asked to do wedding earrings! Excited about that :o)

Sam & Mags: Both doing well, getting ready for winter!

Hideaway

"I don't want you to go, I'll eat you up I love you so." <3

Soon to be the season :o)

I'm starting to feel Christmas festive!!! But I'm trying to suppress it lol I don't really like getting festive until Thanksgiving! But I love Christmas shopping, Peddler's Village, hot chocolate, candy canes, wrapping presents, Christmas music, wreaths, the smell of cookies baking, the smell of the Christmas tree, writing Christmas cards, decorating the Christmas tree, snow, winter coats and scarves, etc.!!! Can't wait!!!

Perfect

Sometimes is never quite enough
If you're flawless, then you'll win my love
Don't forget to win first place
Don't forget to keep that smile on your face

Be a good boy
Try a little harder
You've got to measure up
And make me prouder

How long before you screw it up
How many times do I have to tell you to hurry up
With everything I do for you
The least you can do is keep quiet

Be a good girl
You've gotta try a little harder
That simply wasn't good enough
To make us proud

I'll live for you!
I'll make you what I never was!
If you're the best, then maybe so am I
Compared to him compared to her!
I'm doing this for your own damn good!
You'll make up for what I blew!
What's the problem ...... why are you crying?!

Be a good boy
Push a little farther now
That wasn't fast enough
To make us happy
We'll love you just the way you are
if you're perfect...

(Love Mom & Dad)

Daylight...

You cool your bed-warm hands down on the broken radiator,
And when you lay them freezing on me,
I mumble "can you wake me later?"
But I don't really want you to stop
and you know it so it doesn't stop you
And run your hands from my neck to my chest

Crack the shutters open wide,
I wanna bathe you in the light of day
And just watch you as the rays
tangle up around your face and body
I could sit for hours finding new ways
to be awed each minute
Cuz' the daylight seems to want you
just as much as I want you

It's been minutes, it's been days,
it's been all I will remember
Happy lost in your hair
and the cold side of the pillow
Your hills and valleys are
mapped by my intrepid fingers
And in a naked slumber,
I dream all this again

Halloween Season :o)

My fall has been all over the place.

October started out pretty awesome... so many plans and getting along with everyone! Fall makes me so happy, and it was rubbing off on everyone. I had planned to go to the Poe Warehouse, Renaissance Faire, Where the Wild Things Are, Linvilla Orchards, of course The Bates Motel, and any other scary haunted house type places I could think of! I had originally planned for me and Pete to be two of the Wild Things, but I would have had to start making those costumes in the summer! So we decided on Mother Nature and Friar Tuck :o) which I loved!

Linvilla Orchards was a great time! Pete, me, Ant & Liz went together... and it was so much fun! We went through a cornstalk maze, and we tried the apple sling... the cornstalk maze was fun... we never really got lost, suprisingly lol and the apple sling was exactly how it sounds... a giant sling shot for apples... and I can't believe not one of us hit the targets lol Then we went to eat some yummy butterfly chips (SO GOOD!) After that, we visited the animals which was some craziness. Crazy haired chickens, funny noises and greedy goats! We brought home some goodies and then came home to play some Beatles Rock Band :o)

Then came the weekend of Where the Wild Things Are, Cosi and Poe Warehouse... Where the Wild Things Are, I loved loved loved <3 it reminded me of being a kid again... and I just love that. Cosi was amazing! Haven't been there in years, and it was exactly as good as I remembered... don't you love that? Then Poe Warehouse in the city... I thought this was awesome! Alittle bit haunted house, alittle bit performance... it was really good. I'm so glad I made it to that!

Then after that everything sort of went downhill... I should've known better than to be so relying on people. People are generally unreliable. Atleast I know where I stand, you know. I know I do not fit in with my family, I get this, I understand this... I accept this and I'll move on. I still love them though.

After some family woes, there was rain rain rain followed by one thing going wrong after the other. My bed fiasco being one. Bates Motel wound up being horrible due to said family issues. Due to rain, we couldn't really go to any other haunted houses. And then I had to start making me and Pete's costumes. Pete looked great as Friar Tuck :o) he was so cute (Snuggie Monster) lmao. I liked the way my costume came out... I felt good and confident and pretty :o) despite being a big girl.

The Renaissance Faire was pretty much a wash, but we did our best to enjoy what we could and we did :o) We went to one show, shopped around, bought some souvies and then it started raining so we decided it was time to head home. We got home for Halloween night, had some yummy junk lol but of course what would my favorite holiday be without coming home to the family who can't stand me?! So we actually went to bed around 10:30... bleh.

Next day, I thought I could make up for the movies I didn't watch on Halloween. It was our family Halloween party. I bought these reddish clay animal ears from the Ren Faire so I decided to be a fox for the party and not get all done up in the Mother Nature costume again. So went to store, bought some fabric and fluff and made myself a fox tail. LoL I liked the way that costume came out too lol. Party was actually pretty good! Alot of people came, but of course as always the highlights of the party to me were the little ones... Brian, Lily and Ben. They are such cutie pies. I really wish I could see them more often. I love them so much <3 Brian was dressed up as Batman, a costume Colleen made, and it looked great! Lily was a witch, and she looked so cute. And Ben was Joker... I saw him in his purple courduroy suit which was adorable. But haven't seen him in his Joker make up yet!





After everyone left, Pete & I and my Mom watched The Changeling (the old one with George C Scott which is not the same as the new one). I forgot how much I liked that movie.

To sum up my Halloween season, I decided that by next Halloween... Pete and I will be living in our own place. The bullsh, hurt and hypocrisy that exists in this house and family are too much to handle this close to heart. It has taken me so long to feel like myself again after the past couple of years, and my family doesn't care in the least that they are pushing me back there again. Right now, I am tense, my chest hurts, and I feel like I'm about to snap. I honestly don't know how much my family and I will be talking after I move out for the last time. It sort of feels like we will be washing our hands of each other. And if thats the way it has to be then it will be.

But for today, the sky is absolutely beautiful, the weather is amazing, I am listening to amazing music, fall is all around me... and I am going to try to enjoy it as much as I can while it lasts <3