So we are finally here! The Wedding Celebration is this Saturday so this week I am running around like a crazy person trying to get everything ready for it! Getting the dress dry cleaned, making sure people understood the invites, working on favors, cleaning the house and making sure we have everything ready for the trip... thank God its small is all I have to say... I have been stressed with 50 people... imagine if I had the big, traditional wedding, yuck! Ha Ha :o) And lets pray for the weather to be cooler so I'm not dying in the dress!
I am so happy that Corey and Pete's Dad are coming! Pete's face lit up when he told me. I didn't think they were going to make it... but they surprised us at the last minute! So good things that way... I hate that we aren't able to visit. We are trying to visit there for Thanksgiving! Hopefully we can, it would be good to see everybody... especially since we got married :o)
I am still waiting for this one package to come in the mail which is the one I ordered first, grrr. I don't get it! I really hope it gets here in time! Sea Otter charms :o) yes, I know I'm a geek. But they are my favorite animal, and I get to see them for the first time next week!!! The best present ever would be me to play with sea otters for a little while, you know like dolphins. I don't even know if they have that lol but that would be awesome...
Monday, July 13, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
The End of a Long Chapter...
So a long chapter of my life has come to an end. Its been up, its been down. Its been amazing, and its been a nightmare. I am sad to see it end. But there's just no other way.
A friend.
A friend doesn't do the things she has done.
Through this whole time I wanted to believe she was the good person she claimed to be. I let her charm and lust for life blind me. But its always there. The reality of who she really is. Even if I were to forgive her for the past, I realize now I could never forget. Especially because she has not changed. She forces herself on to you. I don't even know if she realizes what she does. She drains you and uses you up until you have nothing left. She treats me like I am a child. I am stronger than she will ever be. She never understood and never will what I have been through in my life. And at a time I needed her most, she turned her back on me and betrayed me. All I can say is "What goes around, comes around." She dealt with a situation with friends that I listen to her go on and on about now. And thats all I could think of was that saying. (((Do you remember when that friend asked you to dinner? You told me you were too hurt and not ready to forgive for what she has done. You didn't reply to her message. Now you know what I was doing whenever you asked me to go out with you. I was not ready to put myself out there again. I did not want to be hurt like that again.))) I have tried to give her chances... and almost thought we could be friends again. But I will not let myself be hurt like again. I am a different person than I was then. I was weak and vulnerable due to everything that was going on. Now I am strong and independent. I don't need a fair weather friend. A friend who has time to vent and unload all of their problems on to you and can not return the favor. She is the epitome of the TOXIC FRIEND. I have been through the dark and came back to the light. I used to think I needed her vain compliments and reassurance. But I do not need that from anyone. I have proved to myself that I can get through these things. I have all the love I need in my life, the good kind, the unconditional kind. Not the kind of love when its convenient for you to love. Despite not having a perfect life, I love life and all that it has to offer. And accept that there are things I cannot change, and that things will happen, good and bad. And believe in myself that I can handle what life brings me. I am not perfect, and do not claim to be. I have many of my own flaws. But I know I deserve better than that.
If you see this, here is a message to you...
"I am sad that we cannot be friends. There is good in you. But you are consumed by trivial and harmful things. You are a very hurtful person. And I respect myself too much to be friends with you. I hope in time you will open your eyes. I do not wish bad on you. I wish you happiness in your life. I love you for the good in you. And I will treasure our good memories forever. Goodbye."
A friend.
A friend doesn't do the things she has done.
Through this whole time I wanted to believe she was the good person she claimed to be. I let her charm and lust for life blind me. But its always there. The reality of who she really is. Even if I were to forgive her for the past, I realize now I could never forget. Especially because she has not changed. She forces herself on to you. I don't even know if she realizes what she does. She drains you and uses you up until you have nothing left. She treats me like I am a child. I am stronger than she will ever be. She never understood and never will what I have been through in my life. And at a time I needed her most, she turned her back on me and betrayed me. All I can say is "What goes around, comes around." She dealt with a situation with friends that I listen to her go on and on about now. And thats all I could think of was that saying. (((Do you remember when that friend asked you to dinner? You told me you were too hurt and not ready to forgive for what she has done. You didn't reply to her message. Now you know what I was doing whenever you asked me to go out with you. I was not ready to put myself out there again. I did not want to be hurt like that again.))) I have tried to give her chances... and almost thought we could be friends again. But I will not let myself be hurt like again. I am a different person than I was then. I was weak and vulnerable due to everything that was going on. Now I am strong and independent. I don't need a fair weather friend. A friend who has time to vent and unload all of their problems on to you and can not return the favor. She is the epitome of the TOXIC FRIEND. I have been through the dark and came back to the light. I used to think I needed her vain compliments and reassurance. But I do not need that from anyone. I have proved to myself that I can get through these things. I have all the love I need in my life, the good kind, the unconditional kind. Not the kind of love when its convenient for you to love. Despite not having a perfect life, I love life and all that it has to offer. And accept that there are things I cannot change, and that things will happen, good and bad. And believe in myself that I can handle what life brings me. I am not perfect, and do not claim to be. I have many of my own flaws. But I know I deserve better than that.
If you see this, here is a message to you...
"I am sad that we cannot be friends. There is good in you. But you are consumed by trivial and harmful things. You are a very hurtful person. And I respect myself too much to be friends with you. I hope in time you will open your eyes. I do not wish bad on you. I wish you happiness in your life. I love you for the good in you. And I will treasure our good memories forever. Goodbye."
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Invitations are done!
So me and my Mom worked very hard tonight and got all the invites done! They look so pretty!!! I won't tell what they look like 'cause that will spoil it, but I do love them!!! Getting so excited for the Celebration!!!
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
OptimYstic :o)
I came across this article and fell in love. It makes too much sense... I wish we all could... we would be so much happier! What do you say???
Body/Soul: Living In The Now
by Deborah Noel
Graphic Illustration by Darren Schwindaman
February 8, 2006
Can you feel your feet? No, not with your hands. In this moment, can you feel the sensations going on in those two things that carry you around all day? What about your left little toe? Can you feel "inside" it? Chances are good that unless the poor thing is yelping in pain, you've given it no thought at all. How about the inside of your right knee? Or the tip of your left shoulder blade? Are you living in your body, or is your body simply following your brain around?
We live in a culture of "talking heads," and the heads doing most of the talking belong to us. What were you thinking before reading this newspaper? Was it about something in the past? "I can't believe what he said to me! … That jerk in the pickup cut me off! … Good grief, I screwed up again. What an idiot I am." Or it could have been something in the future. "Where will I get the money? … What if I bombed that test? … I'll be happy when I finally get a new job, house or car." Sound familiar?
Can we change any of those situations by thinking about them constantly? No. Does it make us feel good to think about them? No. Then why do we choose to do it? It is a choice, after all.
Let us make another choice. Think. In this moment, what do I lack? Am I fed, clothed and warm? Most of us are. But do we spend much time thinking about how good things really are right this minute? I'm getting better at it, but I ain't there yet. How about you?
The concept of living in the moment is not new. Teachers, philosophers and motivational speakers have preached it for centuries. Why don't more of us practice it? Some may say it's only for Tibetan monks on mountaintops. But there is a distinctly practical side to changing the way we think. Scientists have demonstrated the effect of stress on our bodies, and we know how hard it is to bear. That is why we constantly seek ways to reduce it. From spa treatments to TV, books and movies, to drugs and alcohol, we look for escape from stress.
Shouldn't we consider the source instead? Who creates all this anger, anxiety, fear, guilt and worry? We do it—by allowing the continuous talk in our heads. The guy who cut us off in traffic is not the culprit. Our reaction to him is. And the negativity grows every time we push the instant replay button. Eventually, these brain loops affect the body, causing muscle tension, indigestion, headaches and more. A continuous stream can cause serious disease and impaired relationships. It would be cheaper, easier and much more fun to simply change our minds—before we land in the doctor's office with a self-inflicted illness.
For the spiritually inclined, there are other advantages to changing our thought patterns. One cannot connect to God with a mind full of negative thoughts. Many of us have begun some form of meditative practice, but often have difficulty taking the feeling of presence into our everyday lives.
One opportunity is to create an awareness of how our bodies feel in the moment. Which brings us back to our feet, so as a beginning exercise, try this. Give your feet a nice massage. Thank them for carrying your baggage around. And don't think about anything except how good it feels.
Body/Soul: Living In The Now
by Deborah Noel
Graphic Illustration by Darren Schwindaman
February 8, 2006
Can you feel your feet? No, not with your hands. In this moment, can you feel the sensations going on in those two things that carry you around all day? What about your left little toe? Can you feel "inside" it? Chances are good that unless the poor thing is yelping in pain, you've given it no thought at all. How about the inside of your right knee? Or the tip of your left shoulder blade? Are you living in your body, or is your body simply following your brain around?
We live in a culture of "talking heads," and the heads doing most of the talking belong to us. What were you thinking before reading this newspaper? Was it about something in the past? "I can't believe what he said to me! … That jerk in the pickup cut me off! … Good grief, I screwed up again. What an idiot I am." Or it could have been something in the future. "Where will I get the money? … What if I bombed that test? … I'll be happy when I finally get a new job, house or car." Sound familiar?
Can we change any of those situations by thinking about them constantly? No. Does it make us feel good to think about them? No. Then why do we choose to do it? It is a choice, after all.
Let us make another choice. Think. In this moment, what do I lack? Am I fed, clothed and warm? Most of us are. But do we spend much time thinking about how good things really are right this minute? I'm getting better at it, but I ain't there yet. How about you?
The concept of living in the moment is not new. Teachers, philosophers and motivational speakers have preached it for centuries. Why don't more of us practice it? Some may say it's only for Tibetan monks on mountaintops. But there is a distinctly practical side to changing the way we think. Scientists have demonstrated the effect of stress on our bodies, and we know how hard it is to bear. That is why we constantly seek ways to reduce it. From spa treatments to TV, books and movies, to drugs and alcohol, we look for escape from stress.
Shouldn't we consider the source instead? Who creates all this anger, anxiety, fear, guilt and worry? We do it—by allowing the continuous talk in our heads. The guy who cut us off in traffic is not the culprit. Our reaction to him is. And the negativity grows every time we push the instant replay button. Eventually, these brain loops affect the body, causing muscle tension, indigestion, headaches and more. A continuous stream can cause serious disease and impaired relationships. It would be cheaper, easier and much more fun to simply change our minds—before we land in the doctor's office with a self-inflicted illness.
For the spiritually inclined, there are other advantages to changing our thought patterns. One cannot connect to God with a mind full of negative thoughts. Many of us have begun some form of meditative practice, but often have difficulty taking the feeling of presence into our everyday lives.
One opportunity is to create an awareness of how our bodies feel in the moment. Which brings us back to our feet, so as a beginning exercise, try this. Give your feet a nice massage. Thank them for carrying your baggage around. And don't think about anything except how good it feels.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Married life and well Life in general :o)
Love: Married life is so good! I don't know how, but I am constantly falling in love again with my husband all over again all the time! I love feeling that way. He is the cheese to my macaroni <3 He's working so hard for us, and I appreciate it so much. We are seeing so much of each other due to me being unemployed, and I am soaking it up because it won't be like that forever!
Kids/Pets: We got Evey fixed a couple weeks ago... and it was then that we realized that she wasn't eating. It brought me to tears :o( I didn't realize that she hadn't been eating. She was so skinny. So over the past couple of weeks, I have been on top of her trying to get her healthy again. And she is doing amazing! Eating everything up. And her personality has gotten so much better... probably due to getting her fixed, and us doting on her so much. My mother stills want us to give her away. I just don't know if I can do it. She has turned into a sweetheart although we are still keeping Maggie and her separated. We might have to move out sooner than I thought. I don't think I can stomach giving her away. This week I am going to try introducing Maggie to her again. If she warms to her over the next couple of weeks, I will make my decision then. Maggie is doing great! Lovey dovey and silly. I love her so much! Although she is in heat and making a mess. We will be getting her fixed this week. Money has been so tight lately. And Sammy has been of course doing awesome! This week was Evey and Sammy's birthday! Sammy turned 5! I can't believe he is 5! It makes me sad because he really isn't a puppy anymore :o( but he still seems it! Love my kids :o)
Job: Blah. I have been trying to find a job since January... no one is hiring! I have tried everywhere. Its getting extremely frustrating... hopefully something will come up soon! And not be a terrible 9 to 5. Jewelry business I have started is doing good though! I have gotten offers of people wanting to sell my designs in their stores like hair/nail salons and places like that. Although its tough staying up on that too without much money. Pete gets frustrated with his job alot. He works his butt off, but doesn't get much for it. He's only the one who hears it about other people's screw ups and things like that. Such is life in that line of work, being young and being a guy with a pervy boss who favors the young girls. Even though they, well most, suck!
Living Situation: Could be better. I am grateful that my folks are letting us stay until something works out for us. Apartments are ridiculous around here. Especially when I can't find a job. But being a married couple in your parents' home is tough. We just want to be us, and we can't do that here. Sometimes it is amazing being here like when we were kids! And sometimes it is awful to where everyone is avoiding each other, fighting or not talking. Sometimes we seriously have to walk on eggshells. Either way it is time we got our own place again for good.
Everything else!: So far summer hasn't been terrible... I mean weather wise. Everyone who knows me knows the heat/humidity and I do not mix. It drains all my energy. I actually prefer the cooler, rainy days to the sunny, hot & humid days! Haven't been to many festivities as of yet! We've got a few Rose Tree Park concerts coming up! The first one I can't wait for - The Caribbean Authentics! A Caribbean band who plays the steel drums, can't wait for that! And we'll also be going to Cape May in August which will be awesome of course. Thats one of our favorite places to go in the world! We would move there if we could! And of course the highlights being - Our Official Wedding Celebration will be taking place at The Chart House on Columbus Blvd/Delaware Ave... awesome restaurant that overlooks the water! Looking forward to that! And our big trip to the west coast!!! Which will sort of be like a honeymoon, ha ha, but not officially. But we are going a few days after the wedding celebration. CAN'T WAIT, CAN'T WAIT, CAN'T WAIT!!!
On a sad note, can't seem to shake the passing away of MJ :o( I have just been so sad about it. I guess because its like a piece of my childhood died. Me and my brother singing and watching Moonwalker. Its just crazy. And how sad his life turned out to be. I hope none of those accusations were true... but I guess we'll never know. But hopefully he is in a good place now.
Well thats it for now... as if that wasn't enough! Ha Ha.
Kids/Pets: We got Evey fixed a couple weeks ago... and it was then that we realized that she wasn't eating. It brought me to tears :o( I didn't realize that she hadn't been eating. She was so skinny. So over the past couple of weeks, I have been on top of her trying to get her healthy again. And she is doing amazing! Eating everything up. And her personality has gotten so much better... probably due to getting her fixed, and us doting on her so much. My mother stills want us to give her away. I just don't know if I can do it. She has turned into a sweetheart although we are still keeping Maggie and her separated. We might have to move out sooner than I thought. I don't think I can stomach giving her away. This week I am going to try introducing Maggie to her again. If she warms to her over the next couple of weeks, I will make my decision then. Maggie is doing great! Lovey dovey and silly. I love her so much! Although she is in heat and making a mess. We will be getting her fixed this week. Money has been so tight lately. And Sammy has been of course doing awesome! This week was Evey and Sammy's birthday! Sammy turned 5! I can't believe he is 5! It makes me sad because he really isn't a puppy anymore :o( but he still seems it! Love my kids :o)
Job: Blah. I have been trying to find a job since January... no one is hiring! I have tried everywhere. Its getting extremely frustrating... hopefully something will come up soon! And not be a terrible 9 to 5. Jewelry business I have started is doing good though! I have gotten offers of people wanting to sell my designs in their stores like hair/nail salons and places like that. Although its tough staying up on that too without much money. Pete gets frustrated with his job alot. He works his butt off, but doesn't get much for it. He's only the one who hears it about other people's screw ups and things like that. Such is life in that line of work, being young and being a guy with a pervy boss who favors the young girls. Even though they, well most, suck!
Living Situation: Could be better. I am grateful that my folks are letting us stay until something works out for us. Apartments are ridiculous around here. Especially when I can't find a job. But being a married couple in your parents' home is tough. We just want to be us, and we can't do that here. Sometimes it is amazing being here like when we were kids! And sometimes it is awful to where everyone is avoiding each other, fighting or not talking. Sometimes we seriously have to walk on eggshells. Either way it is time we got our own place again for good.
Everything else!: So far summer hasn't been terrible... I mean weather wise. Everyone who knows me knows the heat/humidity and I do not mix. It drains all my energy. I actually prefer the cooler, rainy days to the sunny, hot & humid days! Haven't been to many festivities as of yet! We've got a few Rose Tree Park concerts coming up! The first one I can't wait for - The Caribbean Authentics! A Caribbean band who plays the steel drums, can't wait for that! And we'll also be going to Cape May in August which will be awesome of course. Thats one of our favorite places to go in the world! We would move there if we could! And of course the highlights being - Our Official Wedding Celebration will be taking place at The Chart House on Columbus Blvd/Delaware Ave... awesome restaurant that overlooks the water! Looking forward to that! And our big trip to the west coast!!! Which will sort of be like a honeymoon, ha ha, but not officially. But we are going a few days after the wedding celebration. CAN'T WAIT, CAN'T WAIT, CAN'T WAIT!!!
On a sad note, can't seem to shake the passing away of MJ :o( I have just been so sad about it. I guess because its like a piece of my childhood died. Me and my brother singing and watching Moonwalker. Its just crazy. And how sad his life turned out to be. I hope none of those accusations were true... but I guess we'll never know. But hopefully he is in a good place now.
Well thats it for now... as if that wasn't enough! Ha Ha.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
April 26, 2009 <3
So this is a tad late,but I wanted to start a blog as a family :o)
For the first blog, I will be bringing over my entry from right after we got married!
"So...
WE DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And to the tell you the truth I am still on Cloud 9!!!
Planning a wedding is stressful... and to try and please everyone is impossible. It was really starting to take away from what the day is supposed to mean. So we decided to elope... knowing it possibly might upset certain loved ones. But we hoped that they would understand why and how much we loved each other and we didn't want this long drawn out thing, we just wanted to get married and start our lives together as Mr. & Mrs. Weddell!!!
So we did it!!!
The week before was alittle stressed, but we couldn't get over our excitement about what we were about to do!!!
On THE day, the sun was beating down hot... unseasonably warm! But as soon as I stepped outside finally in my dress and all done up... it had cooled drastically!!!
My Mom and I drove to Cove Beach after taking some pictures... when I stepped out of the car, everyone made me feel beautiful :o) especially my soon-to-be husband! This was the first time I was at this side of Cape May. It was the most beautiful beach, perfect <3 The sun was setting, and if you looked out the view was incredible... the jetties and the lighthouse in the distance and of course the cove! The sun was warm, the breeze was cool and the soundtrack was the waves crashing into the jetties and the sand...
The Reverend was so nice and funny!!! He made everyone feel at ease... Iwasn't nervous at all though... just super excited!!! In minutes, I was going to be Mrs. Weddell!!! We started the ceremony, and I couldn't take my eyes off of Pete, he looked amazing... but his eyes... full of love and so sincere <3 I fought back the tears really hard especially when he starting saying his vows... I love him so much. We were squeezing each other's hands and whispering 'I love yous.' I tried to show him how much he meant to me while I spoke my vows to him. I didn't mess up once!
I was already floating off to Cloud 9 and tried to hold on so I could hear and remember everything... and I did... and "I now pronounce you man and wife!" <3 I didn't want to let him go!!! It felt amazing that my parents were there. It felt so right. It felt perfect :o)
And so on Sunday, April 26th, 2009, in Cape May, New Jersey at Sunset on Cove Beach, we became MR. & MRS. WEDDELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The most unforgettable and happiest day of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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